Chaos

Sometimes the universe likes to throw a little chaos into the mix. The last few days have been a lesson in that. I spent Saturday running around doing stuff for my sister's baby shower. The shower was Sunday. My brother-in-law almost got a ticket on the way to the baby shower because he ran a red light. We were late getting to the location to set up for the shower. Luckily, friends and family chipped in to help set up. We had a nice turn out, and everything went smoothly other than the fact that we ran out of plates. My mom, daughter, and grandpa's wife headed back to my mom's house while we finished packing stuff up. When we got to my mom's house, we were informed that the neighbor's dog had just bit my daughter. That resulted in a trip to urgent care, and then running all over the place trying to get a prescription for antibiotics filled. We ended up staying the night at my mom's house. My daughter stayed home from school on Monday. Tuesday, I had to work, then take her to the doctor for a follow up, then go to my Toastmaster's meeting. I was Toastmaster for the night. My computer and printer didn't want to cooperate, so I had a hard time printing out what I needed for the meeting. Our speaker for the night cancelled. On the way there, I had to take a detour because my road was closed over the train tracks. All in all, it has been a stressful couple of days. My ulcer is flaring up, and I just want to stay in bed.

With being sick, the baby shower, and everything else, I have been trying my best to stay on track. My exercise has flown out the window. I am still doing my best to get it in, but I haven't been very successful. My eating hasn't been too bad. While I was sick, I had to force myself to eat. Now that my ulcer is flaring up, I may have to do that again. All I can do is just keep doing my best.

Tell Me Why

Last week at my Toastmasters Club, I did a speech about staying on track while on vacation. Maybe I'll share it here, since everyone liked it. We had visitors from another club, and after the meeting one guy asked why I'm so strict with tracking. Couldn't I just eat healthy, and not worry about that? My answer at the time was that I'm afraid of gaining the weight back. There's more to it than that though. On one hand, I am afraid of gaining the weight back. On the other hand, I'm afraid that without weighing, measuring, and tracking, I won't eat enough. Although I was never diagnosed as anorexic, there was a period in my life when I didn't eat. I starved myself, trying to be thin. For a very short time, I was below a BMI of 20. I know that I wouldn't exactly go to that extreme these days, but I can guarantee that I would find myself taking smaller portions than necessary of anything that wasn't a fruit or vegetable. I'm REALLY bad at estimating proper portions. It's just a fact that I know about myself, that I have to deal with. The whole point is that I continue to weigh, measure, and track my food so that I will maintain my current body weight, within a few pounds. Maybe some day I'll feel confident enough to stop doing that, but now is not the time.

Staying on track when sick

I have been sick a lot lately. Way more than I normally am. It's driving me crazy! The two hardest parts are exercising and eating. I've had a lot of junk in my lungs, so I'm not real keen on exercising lately. I'm used to at least walking every day, and feel like a major couch potato right now. Eating is another major issue. Due to sinus infections, nothing tastes good, so I'm barely eating my Points most days. I had to force myself to find something to eat a few days ago, just to make it to my Daily Points Target. Then a sore throat and ear infection were added to the mix, which made me want to eat even less. My life is currently revolving around soft foods. So much fun! I'm trying to maintain my weight, not lose even more!

My crazy life

Since September there have been huge changes in my life. I was given a promotion at work. I am no longer a customer service drone. I now list products on Amazon.com for our company. It's nice not being tied to a phone all day. In October, I decided to join Toastmasters. Every Tuesday night I go to a local Toastmasters meeting. If you've never heard of Toastmasters, you might want to check them out. Here is the site for Toastmasters International, where you can find a club in your area. This year, I decided to add some more craziness to my life. I lost most of my weight through Weight Watchers, and since I'm not tied to a phone all day, I decided that now was a good time to go work for them part time. I talked to my boss about it, and started training at the end of April. Then my boss added another responsibility to my job. The company that I work for sells educational materials. We have a website where teachers can create activities. The girl who was in charge of it decided that she wanted to go back to customer service. So I am now in charge of that also. Unfortunately, it means that I will now have to keep somewhat regular hours because I will once again be answering a phone. The good news is that I've gotten only a couple of phone calls so far. So my life has become completely crazy. Add the fact that I have been sick a lot lately, and it's amazing that I have any sanity left.

All of this has made me start to question where I want to go in life. I don't have that part figured out yet, but I'm giving it a lot of thought. I know that there is more to life than this. There is something else out there for me. I just need to find it.

I also changed the name of my blog. I said the other day that I might create a new blog. I decided that I didn't really need to do that. I just changed it so it doesn't sound too much like a book that I read. Now that I am fully caffeinated, it is time to get on with my day.

Long time no blog

I haven't blogged in forever. Maybe I should try getting back into it. Now seems like the perfect time. There are so many changes going on in my life. I was promoted in September. Then at the end of last month, I got new job duties thrust upon me. I am also training to work for Weight Watchers. I'm feeling very overwhelmed right now, and very uncertain about the future. I might create a new blog, because the title of this one reminds me of a book that I read. I can't think of a name right now though. More later...